How to brush the teeth of a dog

First, you must mount your pup in a semi-choke hold...
Second, though your pup may be enjoying the taste of the chicken flavored toothpaste, you must grab a hold of their mandible to pry the mouth open until you see teeth...
Finally, you must realize your pup has some far reaching molars. You may feel as though you are gagging your pup, but this is for the best...
Afterwards, your pup may appear violated and keep distant from you. Do not take this personal, your pup will realize you torture him or her out of love...